Shahrul Azmi: According to Jamal

Shahrul Azmi: According to Jamal

According to Jamal

It was in late 70’s, the whole of Kampong Bahagia was very happy with his achievement. He was never the pride of my hometown until the day he sang that Lancang Kuning in Bintang RTM final. That’s Jamal Abdillah, the gold voice singer that only drug can bring him down, stopping his domination of every top charts in the country. Nope, today is not about THE Jamal Abdillah that I am keen to write about. It is the other Jamal, the fishy smelling Jamal from Sekinchan. Saying he’s delusional is an understatement; he’s more than that, kind of a super wacko that can be gossip materials among the mental patients themselves.

According to this red outfit man, Malaysia is in need of a hero, a Hang Tuah like warrior that can save the nation from an evil force in yellow. This morning, like any other morning for the past year; he spoke in front of cameras with funny little heads nodding around him. He claimed that the Yellow’s is not just yellow, it is worse than that, much worse than the prophecy of Trump winning the election; the yellow is in alliance with the black! He’s not talking about the peace loving black rappers. It is the evil of all blacks, the ISIS!!

Wait till you hear about where he got the information from. Who would have guessed the shorty Rafizi is the culprit? Not me for sure. Jamal could have stop just by showing cheap plastic clear holder with the word ‘sulit’ on top, but he literally crossed the boundary of stupidity by mentioning Rafizi as his informer. If there is a jar that I put in 1 ringgit every time I see something stupid being done in front of cameras, the acts of Jamal alone can buy me a proton saga; the one launched by the tall, dark and handsome polo playing hipster. Uwekk.

I am neither red nor yellow, far from blue and hardly a green. The colours are becoming more confusing as if the acronym itself is not. There are so many of them now, one after another political party with one thing in common, in it are the politicians. That’s what they do, they lie continuously and believe in every cock and bull stories coming out from their mouth. We don’t need Jamal in red, as much as we don’t need the idiotic politicians if only we are allowed to decide our own destiny. It is our problem that is in need of great focus such as the bills, the inequality, the highly speculated housing price and the nasi lemak price be it dara or janda.  

Years since I write a post in this blog, thanks to Jamal Abdillah, it’s his songs that open up my desire to write. He is the real Jamal, the Jamal we really need to listen to kill off the boredom of seeing Malaysian political scene.

Surat Terbuka Buat Danial

Salam sayang,  

Jam ditangan sudah lewat, kurang 20 minit ke jam dua pagi. Pagi ini bukan pagi yang biasa kerana pagi ini bakal penentu buat ayah dan mereka, ini kalilah atau kekal begini.   Tidak pernah ayah gusar begini menghadapi hari penentu, segusar hari kamu dilahirkan di hospital swasta di Shah Alam 10 tahun yang lalu. Ayah pilih hospital itu kerna ayah mahu yang terbaik untuk kamu biarpun berhabisan kantung wang ayah untuk saat itu. Mungkin ada hospital kerajaan yang lebih murah tapi senyuman tawar dan kesesakan manusia di sana barangkali kurang selesa buat Mama.  

Doktor Melayu yang menyambut kamu hari itu tidak sekali pun menanyakan berkenaan kemampuan ayah untuk membayar, yang penting baginya ayah bayar. Dari sijil yang tergantung di dinding bilik hawa dingin Dr itu, tertera singkatan UKM, tanda ijazahnya dari sana. Bangga ayah kerna Melayu sudah berjaya, tapi kenapa bayarannya sama dengan Doktor Cina dan India masih jadi tanda tanya.  

Bagaimana dengan sekolah? Ingat pesan ayah, belajar rajin-rajin biar penuh ilmu didada, besar nanti boleh bantu orang, bukan semata-mata sebab wang. Jadilah apa yang kamu mahu asalkan ianya tidak salah dari mata agama dan usahalah agar kamu jadi sehabis baik jika tidak yang terbaik dalam apa jua yang kamu pilih.   Kita orang Melayu, ada adat dan ada budaya, ada yang elok dan ada yang sia-sia. Namun yang lebih penting kita ada agama dan Islam namanya. Itu yang lagi utama dari bangsa kerna itulah landasan untuk ke syurga yang kekal selamanya.

  Cina, India, Iban dan bangsa yang lain jangan sekali kamu lupa apatah lagi kamu hina. Mereka juga tanggungjawab kita, susah senang harus bersama. Insya-Allah dengan hidayah dan dakwah kamu, Islam bakal jadi pilihan mereka tapi jangan sekali-kali kamu paksa agama atas mereka.   Pagi nanti ayah bakal mengundi pilihan hati, untuk pilih siapa yang ayah rasa mampu untuk memimpin kita. Pilihan ayah mungkin betul mungkin tidak, tapi yang penting pertimbangan waras ayah disudahi dengan tawakal kepada Allah. Harapnya, negara tidak dilanda musibah.  

Ingat tak lagi soalan kamu pasal handicap dalam golf? Sampai hari ini ayah tak terjawab, namun pagi ini ayah rasa ayah bersedia dan jawapan ini ayah jumpa semasa ayah membaca cerita tentang Tun Dr Ismail. Katanya, handicap ini diberi kepada pemain golf baru yang ingin bermain dengan pemain yang lebih handal agar mereka bersaing dan tidaklah kalah teruk. Namun jika selama-lamanya kamu diberi kelebihan barangkali kamu harus rasa malu untuk bermain kerna kamu tidak pernah maju. Oleh itu jadikanlah handicap itu sebagai cabaran dan bukan kelebihan. Begitulah juga ertinya Bumiputera buat kamu dan ayah.

  Pagi ini ayah mahu mohon maaf sekiranya pilihan ayah di peti undi nanti bakal menyusahkan kamu, percayalah itu bukan matlamatnya. Sebagai ayah, tiada apa yang lebih penting dari kejayaan anaknya di dunia dan akhirat.  

Salam Sayang

Ayah.

Beribadat selazat coklat

Armed with my new s-note that wife my bought for me, I am the new and excited man, like a boy receiving his first taste of puberty;not the confused bit but pretty much the excitement of going to school the next day telling friends how beautiful was the girl and how big is my little Johnny.

 Talk about confused, I've been a little bit confused for a long period of time. It started since my puberty (very long time ago but definitely after sunat) until the day I bought a book from a bookstore in Kelantan airport, a state that I've underrated for so long. 'Beribadat selazat coklat ' is a simple book with pages no more than 100, but in it was the answer to my biggest question, hidden for ages only to be seen on my journey back to Kuala Lumpur, 30,080 feet from the ground, closer to heaven if it is above the cloud like what I believe before the puberty kicks in.

I pray before I came across that book but the prayers or the shalat before is like an option that entirely depend on my liking. A magrhib a day. The rest of the fardu only to be considered if the meetings were done, the eyes does not feel like closing for a nap, the assignments were completed, the 18th hole was done provided the flight mate is ok with delaying the lunch at clubhouse and many more 'duty of the world' that were positioned higher in the hierarchy of priority than praying to the god that created us.

  What was the reason to that creation ? My answer before reading that book would be to worship Allah s.w.t, and it's still the answer to me now, but what it means to me before He open up my eyes to that book is very different to how I understand it now. All it was before is nothing more than a phrase, sometimes related to my daily life but most of the time it is like a normal phrase such as Satu Malaysia.

 I've always desire heaven since my mom mentioned about the beauty of living in paradise and the agony of those who end up in hell. To me back then, hell was a sure thing for the believers be it through the highway or the hellway. Going to hell first before heaven is not a bad idea as long as it is all good at the end of the journey -That Was It !! That was the root of all cause !!That was the beginning of my problem.

 If you believe in Allah, you should believe in hell and if you believe in hell you will never think of getting anywhere near it.

   If you believe in Allah you should never doubt His warning about the punishment and the reward.   If you believe in Allah , you will obey His order and never ever think of doing the prohibited act of sin, starting from now and not wait till you're older to repent. It may be too late because you might not reach the age you think suitable for you to repent because if you do believe in Allah, He is the only one who knows the end of you.

  I am no ustaz and I don't have what it takes to be one but what I've are stories, stories about life of a muslim who were born muslim in a muslim country, only to know how to live a muslim life after reading a book that he bought for not more than RM 15 on his way back to KL from Kelantan - a state that he once I hated so much. KL from Kelantan - a state that he once hated so much. Just click here to see what book is it , Jazakallah .

SELAMAT HARI RAYA

Selamat hari raya!!! To all friends, family and enemies… not to forget the Bangla’s that wipes my windshield every now and then. Don’t they go back to Bangla for Hari Raya? I guess not because he did wipe my windshield on first day of hari raya. They should be the one getting ‘duit raya’ but damn the government, the Bangla’s are the one paying ‘duit raya’ via that bio-matrix thingy.

Forget the Banglas, why don’t we just enjoy this raya, obviously by attending the open houses be it the rich’s or the poor’s version of it. But damn the rich one coz they can always claim that freaking raya’s spending thru them company. The poor, well they are the true believers draining every cents from the shallow pocket. It is even worse for the PM, using public money for their extravaganza open houses… damn the first lady for not feeling shy.

Did you watch the tv during hari raya? The theme was spooky Raya, coz every alternate movies are that horror movie. Malaysians are becoming so tahyul, more tahyul than ever. Yo!! Rais the son of Yatim, go do something about it rather than bashing that Mat Sabu everyday thru prime time news.

Anyway, Maaf Zahir dan Batin.

An open letter to Donpedro

Dear Donpedro,

First of all I would to thank you for the coffee this evening, it was a strong one; making my eyes wide open and with that my humble fingers are pretty much active to do the typing. Thanking you for the coffee is much easier than finding the right words of appreciation for the awakening comments you bowled straight to my pin head.

Browsing through my book shelf I finally realized the painful truth, the truth about the knowledge that I’ve been digging all this while, none of the books written by those who really understand the real guidance for mankind, the holy Quran. Grisham, Hitler, Robinson and worst of them all was a book by Shebby Singh (he’s a bad writer even for a ghost).

The discussion we had today and few days earlier pretty much the catalyst for my new resolution on knowledge acquisition, it is the perfect time for me to embark into a new journey although it was always there for the taking; spiritual. Guess what brother? Nowadays, the guidance for mankind is always there on top of my alarm clock, just beside my bed.

Justice is the greatest puzzle that I struggled to understand let alone solving them, it stuck in my small brain and bugging me it did. Why must the rich enjoy every moment of their life when the poor struggle to feed them? A question, of which to me the answer is very important but to you Donpedro, it is no longer relevant. Looking at idealism doesn’t make you a man with less Iman, but ignoring the quran while doing so will lead you to disastrous end, that I learned from you.

Brother,

Do you think we can change the system? Do you think we can have better hospitals? Do you think the corruption in politics will end? Do you think Malays will look at Mercedes as the element of ‘besi dan tayar’? Do you think K with the big J can be stop? What else are you thinking, brother?

These entire questions are the beginning of my humble expedition into the new knowledge that you’ve established in my blog. One thing for sure I would not eat every bit of your ideas and experienced coz this time the one who conclude will be Shahrul Azmi himself. To that I would like to thank you and this will be one of the many open letters from me to you.

Regards,

Shahrul Azmi

12:15 AM (2.12.10)

Capitalism - POV Shahrul Azmi

It is amazing that a year ago the world economy collapsed just because a company by the name of Pak Leman Brothers was on the verge of bankruptcy. Why it is, Lehman was so important? Why was this company a starter to massive negative domino that affected the entire world?

One after another country came up with what they called the stimulus package, not excluding our country Malaysia. The world panic, one after another analyst came up with intelligent prediction such that the recovery might only be possible in 2015.

Yesterday I watched Al Jazeera economic review and they concluded that we are out of the misery but far from regaining the same peak just before the collapsed… the black day

How do they measure all this? What GDP and all other jargons? Why are we panicking when they are the one having problem? At 2:15 in the morning I took out my pen and a piece of paper. POV Shahrul Azmi – what the f*ck is all this?

God created the universe with its basic necessity; if we share, the world will have enough and the mankind will survive. That is ‘ideal’.

Some people get a little bit greedy and they think they deserve more mainly due to their hard work and brain that are better than the others (which they tend to forget that God created that too).

The ‘genius’ created ways to earn more, simply by improvisation of common practices and procedures. So they earn more by selling their inventions. What happen to the people with less brain, surely they will need to work harder in order to earn the latest inventions and keep up with improvement.

The chain will then continue, the one on top of the pyramid will make more money and the one at the bottom will suffer. This concept is viable in the beginning but what are the effect when population grows and the resources runs dry?

Take starbucks for instance, it was a business invented by the capitalist with deceiving objectives. The idea was to have coffee shops where one can relax with friends, having the best brewed coffee, and definitely look cool doing it. What was wrong with the existing coffee shop? Why does it need to be so expensive?

It is a matter of choice to be or not to be associated to the chain but the capitalist is no stupid. Since capital is not restriction to them, they will allocate substantial amount convincing the general public on the necessity to be part of the cool coffee drinking society. Before you notice, you’ll sip your first mocha.

Well, what do you think happen when we don’t have the money to drink at starbucks? Will the capitalist let us go and close the outlets? Of cost they wouldn’t do that, they will try to make you come no matter what. They will make you work for more money or they could be lending their money to you with massive interest with one thing in mind… you buy their products.

How do they loan you money? They are not bank? Remember, they are the one with capital and you’re the one without.

This is what they do, and it is scary. First they will tell you the bad news, the economy is collapsing and something need to be done or else the giants will fall. General public should continue to spend or else dooms day.

What would we normally do? Yes, PANIC. Daddy will tell their bosses about it, the bosses will tell the government that they are in trouble and at the end of it the whole country will be panicking and the government will hit the red button.

Remember what I told you about god creations and the resources? This is where it links. We will dig more oil, take out the savings, and withdraw the EPF continue with all other action ignoring the future plan. Next, the prime minister call up press, follow up with a statement, “This is the 50 Billion stimulus package, spend it wisely”. At a corner you can see the capitalist smiling… they are coming back.

Pusat Tahfiz Amal? Selling Posters?

photo courtesy of the photographer

“Just give them the money and you will get the reward from God, as long you are ‘ikhlas’ you will get it” a friend.

Pusat Tahfiz Amal, you buy the calendar at RM10 each (the printing course might be 10% of that) or you can just give them the money at any amount as long as you’re ikhlas, the ill manner boy with songkok will surely accept any amount. Innocent today but they will be aggressive if you bombard them with questions in the next 5 days.

This is two weeks ago,

Shahrul Azmi: Adik tak sekolah ke?

The Boy: Sekolah tahfiz kat kedah abang.

Shahrul Azmi: Bila adik sekolah kalau adik ada kat KL

The Boy : Kite orang ada kelas 2 minggu kat PD

Yesterday I saw the same boy, so I asked him why he wasn’t in school; the answer was a carbon copy of the previous… Swear to God I feel like an idiot and I can smell the piss…

Shahrul Azmi: 2 minggu lepas kau cakap dekat aku kau ada camp dekat PD, sekarang kau ada lagi kat sini… bila masa ko belajar.

The Boy: Kita belajar lepas subuhla bang… (And ciow…)

He raised his voice and took the right step by leaving me or else he might be answering more questions, surely, empty handed.

I went thru internet, the issue is nothing new but no real solution to the problem can be found, maybe I should continue digging…

I call up Majlis agama Islam Kedah or MAIK at 04 7333288, a lady answered the phone and she told me that Pusat Tahfiz Amal was asked to stop using kids for collecting donation, when I requested for the official documentation for that she told me to leave my number and Datuk’s Secretary (so wadda??) will call me….nothing till now….

Moment after I made another phone call, this time to JAIS( Jabatan Agama Islam Selangor), 4 extensions later I managed to talk to Zakuan, an officer in JAIS. (03 55243600-ext2096)

This is what he told me;

1. JAIS don’t give any permission to Pusat Tahfiz Amal on collecting donation
2. They must produce an official letter from JAIS.
3. JAIS will never release letter with phrases like ‘Tolong Bantu mereka’ or any other that carry such sentiment.
4. Neither Afghan nor Pakistan individual collector received any letter from JAIS
5. However, JAIS cannot do anything coz there is no enactment allowing them to take action (weird huh? why do the collectors need to get permission from JAIS?)

He told me to report this matter to police… (Damn! Can’t they do that for me, it is his job anyway)

Come to think of it, Pusat Tahfiz Amal is not collecting donation, they’re doing business by selling the posters, legitimate huh? But the fact that they are using under age workers is sickening!! Where do I go from here?

I will never let this go… not this time